Thursday, March 03, 2005

Rut

So many ideas, yet so little time to execute them. My husband made the observation that perhaps I was stuck in a rut--constantly planning, but unable to actually sit down and do them right now. I promised him that anything written down on my idea list are all to be done and finished.

I find my energy so sapped by the end of the day that I can barely move when I get home from work sometimes. Working in an office and dealing with others and their whims on such a constant basis is both physically and mentally draining--esp. when it's not your calling and has nothing to do with who you really are. I joke about becoming an antisocial recluse in my home as soon as I can. All day long I daydream of the creative things I wish I could be doing instead of being parked in front of a computer all day long tik tik ticking away. I know so many others like me...wishing and wanting to do more, but are constrained by bills and monetary needs.

Can you imagine what the world would be like if this wasn't the case? Just a thought.

4 comments:

Karoda said...

I don't remember seeing you at my work place? lol...I could have written this post...I work in social services and it useta be my calling...prided myself on being leader of the pack...advant garde...cutting edge...wore the leotard with the "S" under my clothes and was ready to save the world and fight injustice at a nanosecond...but I've come full circle and now my behind is just tired...welcome to the AQ ring...or have I already welcomed you???

Peace

Elle said...

Thanks Karoda! I'm enjoying everyone's blogs. I love your blog and visit it often! Yeah, I used to be a gung-ho starry-eyed worker. Now, due to years of being burned, I want to go home before I even leave the house, lol. All I really want to do is create, but a sista's gotta eat.

Karoda said...

Yeah, that eating thing...and fixation on a roof really throws a hook into reality ~~sigh~~

arlee said...

Yeah wow reality--what a concept ay?:> I know the feeling---thinking about all you could do then being too wiped at day's end to do it--start small,it helps! And keep a sketchbook for those aha moments at work!!